![]() But being a sugar baby isn’t a sustainable lifestyle. The appeal of a sugar daddy is obvious: fantastic meals, exotic vacations, a fierce wardrobe, and even rent money. Shopping may not be your sugar daddy’s idea of a romantic date, so aim to engrave his plastic with your name. Before any trip or party, explain that you don’t own a stitch of appropriate clothing (“but this is a Michelin-starred tapas restaurant!”). Wait until he’s in a good mood to shoot him a sext with a link to those Jimmy Choos (“ … and I’d wear only these”). Keep your emotional needs in check via friends and lovers (but don’t mention these “support networks” to your sugar daddy, especially when monogamy is assumed).Īsk him to spring for a personal trainer and regular spa days so you can look your best for him. The job description of a sugar baby, as we’re called, is to be fun, happy, busy, sexy, and mysterious. Other feelings freak sugar daddies out - so if you aren’t happy or busy enough, embellish! Text him photos of stylish parties stolen from Instagram while you watch Girls and eat rice pudding alone, on your period. Not only is this more manageable, but your unavailability keeps him interested. Unlike I did, avoid domesticity and limit dates to two or three nights a week. So take advantage of that and just enjoy the exciting experiences (he’s paying for) together - be it on Broadway or in Bali. These guys are good at making money, not having a girlfriend. Know Your Roles … and Play With Others on the Side. Know your approach and stay consistent.Ģ. “Where do you want to travel first?” they’d respond on cue. “I just want to see the world and tell meaningful stories,” I’d say wistfully. Some guys expect further ego stroking, but I played the smart-but-free-spirited angle instead: more Holly Golightly than Holly Madison. Your worst-case scenario now includes an epic meal. When you find a potential match, pick a swank restaurant so you know he really has money. ![]() If your photos are too trashy, you’ll be treated like a prostitute. ![]() Determine your boundaries (I wasn’t comfortable meeting men that were married or over 50, for example), then snap a few suggestive selfies. For a less seedy option, try searching OKCupid by salary. With, guys bid for first dates pocketing a couple Franklins for showing up never sucks. I met Eli on, the most popular and direct sugar-dating service. You’ll have to sweet talk an army of frogs before you meet one you could imagine having sex with. Despite these fallbacks, many of my girlfriends - from the bossy professional to those of DIY anarchist persuasion - still ask for pointers on acquiring their own sugar daddy. I know I have to quit - but I dread the thought of reverting back to a bodega-based diet or, God forbid, drugstore makeup. If I don’t properly tend his every need, a tantrum erupts: “You ate all the Häagen-Dazs? You’re just using me! It’s over!” Ultimately, being paid to put up with these pathological antics is toxic. It’s the emotional labor that’s challenging: I do all the grown-up relationship work, from planning our dates to downright mothering. I give Eli what money is worthless without: friendship and fun. In fact, if there’s anything unbalanced about this equation, it’s in his favor. Tropical vacations and designer lingerie are decadent, but the habitual treats - like organic groceries, a cleaning lady, and pedicures - are what had me hooked.Įyebrows may raise, but I see no moral issue here. ![]() This was how I inadvertently let him into the “boyfriend zone.” In turn, I got to shop more, join his fancy gym, and eat at fabulous restaurants nightly. In my depression, I buried myself in Eli’s bed, welcoming the high-thread-count comfort of his luxury loft. Two months later, I had to put Hemingway down. ![]() On our fifth date, he offered me $2,500 a month so I could relax with my dog. Six months and as many unpaid vet bills later, I found a nerdy-cute i-banker in his late thirties Eli immediately took care of my debt and transferred Hemingway to the city’s best vet. Every week or two, I would meet another potential sugar daddy. In other words, a fantasy complete with five-star pet care. There would be shopping in Milan, swimming in the Maldives, and gambling in Monaco. I imagined my life with a sugar daddy to look like a mash-up between an old black-and-white movie and a rap video - with ample time left over to write the Next Great American Something. Huddled at the bus stop, Hemingway drooling on my knee, I Googled: “How to find a sugar daddy.”īut I’d always been curious. And all the freelance work I could find wouldn’t come close to footing the impending bills. After the $500 I’d dropped at the vet, I couldn’t even afford a cab home. It all started two years ago when my bulldog, Hemingway, got sick. ![]()
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